Showing posts with label horror. Show all posts
Showing posts with label horror. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 18, 2017
Stanley (1972)
Stanley (1972)
Director: William Grefe
Starring: Chris Robinson, Alex Rocco, Steve Alaimo
Format: DVD
Plot: A young Seminole Indian uses his rattlesnake to take revenge on all those he believes have wronged him.
Florida regional B-movie maker William Grefe is best known for helming some of the worst films of all time, like Death Curse of Tartu and Sting of Death. Given that reputation I went into this - a lesser-known nature revenge flick - with extremely low expectations and came out pleasantly surprised.
Now, don't get me wrong, this isn't a great movie. In fact, the first two-thirds are for the most part pretty boring, as we meet ex-Vietnam Vet and Seminole Indian Tim (Robinson), who has shunned society to live in the Everglades with his pet rattlesnakes (including the titular Stanley). We also meet local crime boss Thomkins (Alex Rocco from THE GODFATHER), his slutty daughter, a variety of Thomkins' henchmen and assorted other locals. When Tim finds out that Thomkins' men killed his father he gets revenge on them, but things don't really pick up pace until another henchman slaughters some of Tim's scaly friends.
Once Tim goes into full-on revenge mode Stanley becomes good fun to watch, full of zany, weird action as only the 70s could provide. Unintentional humor abounds. Among the highlights are Tim explaining about the death of his "family" to a stripclub bouncer, Thomkins diving into a pool full of snakes, the way a henchman named Psycho keeps saying "Yeah Mutha!", and the wacky ending. There's plenty that'll have you shaking your head with a wry, confused smile on your face.
Part Willard (man uses animals to get revenge), part Billy Jack (Native American fights back against evil white men) and part Copperhead (killer snakes), Stanley is worth watching if you're in the mood for an offbeat 70s b-movie.
Wednesday, April 27, 2016
HO NO: Diamond Ninja Force (1988)
Diamond Ninja Force (1988)
Director: Godfrey Ho
Starring: Richard Harrison, Melvin Pitcher, Andy Chworowsky
Format: Stream
Plot: This is a Godfrey Ho movie... you expect plot?
Also known as Ghost Ninja, this is one of the many 80s mash-ups that Godfrey Ho "directed", starring washed-up former sword-and-sandals star Richard Harrison (GIANTS OF ROME). As is usually the case, Ho takes an established movie, adds some newly-shot ninja scenes and voila, ninja mash-up goodness. But unusually he chose a Taiwanese horror movie to chop up, which actually works in this movie's favour.Whereas the non-ninja portions of many of the Ho movies I've seen thus far tend to be a bit boring, that's not the case here. The Taiwanese horror bits are goofy as hell and a whole lot of fun. A family - including mum Fanny and son Bobo (dig those names man!) - finds their home haunted by a ghost, or ghosts (it's hard to tell) and all manner of campy low-rent Amityville Horror stuff happens to them. Some of it is quite adult in nature, so we get a strew of sex scenes and nudity. That does get a bit tedious, but it's saved by the variety of supernatural "special effects" which are downright hilarious.

Meanwhile, the bad guy who summoned the "ghost ninja" to haunt the family and drive them off their land, accidentally(?) kills the girlfriend of badass ninja dude Harrison, a member of the titular Diamond Ninja Force. Naturally he vows revenge on the bad guys, leading to a series of "fights" interspersed between the haunting storyline - in each, Harrison shows up and kills a bad guy easily and without any blood (despite using swords and throwing stars). More haunting stuff, another fight, more haunting, another fight... rinse and repeat until the final showdown between Harrison and the main baddie.
Naturally this is a bad movie. The name Godfrey Ho essentially demands that. It has the usual awful dubbing and incoherent plotline (although more coherent than most Ho flicks), and everything else that lovers of bad cinema will revel in. And adding to its appeal is the fact the non-ninja portions are just as fun, not something that is common for Ho's masterpieces. Given that, I think this might be my favourite Godfrey Ho flick so far. I found it on a streaming website called Creepster.tv, but it's also available on Youtube.
Sunday, November 22, 2015
What I Watched - November 15-21 2015
WHAT I WATCHED - NOVEMBER 15-21 2015:
Don't Go in the House (1979) DVD
- I've owned this as part of a Shriek Show triple-feature boxset, (alongside a couple of low budget crime actioners - Cop Killers and Tenement) for a few years now but never got around to watching it. I'm glad I finally did, because this is an awesome gritty old school urban horror/exploitation film along the lines of Maniac. The story itself has elements of Psycho - a guy with mommy issues killing young ladies (although Norman never used a flamethrower!). There's actually some quite creepy moments involving burned bodies coming back to life. One for fans of sleazy late 70s, early 80s grindhouse horror flicks!
- First up is Roger Ward's menacing mo-and-eyebrows combo from this Australian exploitation (Oz-ploitation) classic. I've always loved this movie - it's beautifully shot, has plenty of action and its simple storyline is essentially Most Dangerous Game mixed with 1984. But it also has plenty of tasty cheese to stop it from being too mainstream, like the hairy "freak" hunter, the woman's exploding arrows, the weird futuristic vehicles and the pre-requisite smatterings of T&A and attempted rape. Steve Railsback is a weird choice for a leading man - the guy who would go on to play an uber-creepy Ed Gein is hardly charismatic pin-up material. But that's not to take away from this movie, which is a must for any fans of exploitation flicks.
- As a huge Vincent Price fan (I collect his movies on DVD) this is one that had managed to slip through the cracks, until now. Price's facial hair isn't anything too special, but hey, it's there, so it makes this movie count for this moviethon! Okay, so I was just looking for an excuse to include this one. Vincent is great as always, although rather subdued by his standards (after watching a doco on director Michael Reeves it seems he told the legendary actor to tone down his performance). The supporting cast is great (Ian Ogilvy is always good to watch) and this gets quite brutal in places (like the burning of the witch at the stake - my DVD has a lot of the cut violence restored). This is essentially a western set in ye olde England, and it's a good one! Definite recommendation.
- I'm sure everyone has a movie or two that it seems EVERYONE has seen and enjoyed, but which they've managed to miss somehow. Rather embarrassingly, this is that movie for me. I know it's a cult classic and I do enjoy the Coen brothers, but this one just never found its way in front of my eyes. I had it on my list on Netflix to watch a few months ago, but now when I went to watch it... it's not on Netflix anymore. Don't you hate that? Anyway, a quick acquisition from an "alternative source" and now I can finally say I've seen The Big Lebowski and now know what all the memes and quotes are in reference to. Oh yeah, obviously the mustache in this one belongs to Sam Elliott's The Stranger, although there are a couple of other commendable face-hair efforts in this movie. As for the movie itself, it is as good as everyone makes it out to be. The Dude abides man!
- I've owned this as part of a Shriek Show triple-feature boxset, (alongside a couple of low budget crime actioners - Cop Killers and Tenement) for a few years now but never got around to watching it. I'm glad I finally did, because this is an awesome gritty old school urban horror/exploitation film along the lines of Maniac. The story itself has elements of Psycho - a guy with mommy issues killing young ladies (although Norman never used a flamethrower!). There's actually some quite creepy moments involving burned bodies coming back to life. One for fans of sleazy late 70s, early 80s grindhouse horror flicks!
Diamonds of Kilimandjaro (1983) DVD
- I own this in another Shriek Show box set that I got at the same time as the aforementioned one, this one called "Jungle Girls". It's actually a Jess Franco movie but is pretty tame by his standards. Essentially Tarzan with a female in the vine-swinging role, this one has little in the way of gore and a lot in the way of nudity. It's pretty run of the mill - kind of like a Lenzi/Deodato jungle movie without any of the gut-munching or torture. Watchable but hard to recommend.
Stryker (1983) DVD
- Since I was trawling through long-neglected boxsets on my shelves, I pulled out one called Grindhouse Experience 2, which has something like 10 movies of various drive-in fare. The name of this one, plus the artwork, made it an easy choice to begin making my way through this set. I do love a good cheesy 80s Mad Max-ripoff, and that's what you get here from Filipino director Cirio H Santiago. While this one's not terrible, there are better examples of the genre out there. The final battle is pretty cool, but the lead-up to it is sloppy and quite frankly boring in a lot of places. The highlight is a band of "little people" who dress like Jawas and sound way too much like animated penguin Pingu. Sadly they are on screen for far too little time - if they'd been around more I might have enjoyed this more. A good time-waster, but probably only for the hardcore fan of low budget post-apocalyptic fare.
Blazing Magnum (1976) DVD
- Next up in Grindhouse Experience is this is a movie also known as Shadows in an Empty Room, although that name makes it sound like a giallo, and it's definitely not. Blazing Magnum is a more apt name, because what we have here is an Italian/Canadian production that is clearly influenced by Clint Eastwood's Dirty Harry flicks (one of the sequels of course being Magnum Force). Like Harry Callahan, the main cop in this one uses "unorthodox" methods to get what he needs. With a great cast that includes Martin Landau, John Saxon and Tisa Farrow, and containing one of the best car chase scenes I've seen in a long time, this is great stuff. Definitely recommended.
Slavers (1978) DVD
- Continuing down the Grindhouse Experience 2 road, we move from police action to pure exploitation. Coming in the wake of the highly-successful mini series Roots, this trods over similar ground, telling unflinching stories of the slave trade in Africa in the 1800s. An African couple who are separated by the bad guys are part of the focus, but most of the time is spent on the various white men and women (including Britt Ekland), most of which are completely reprehensible. One scene in particular - involving target practice on swimming natives - is quite shocking. My biggest complaint is that the racist villains in this for the most part don't get a satisfactory comeuppance. Obviously this is never comfortable viewing, but is a good reminder of a dark period in man's history.
Deathgasm (2015) AVI
- I watched this a couple of weeks ago as part of 31 Nights of Terror and enjoyed it so much I had to watch it again, this time with my girlfriend. Check out my review here: http://moviegeeknz.blogspot.co.nz/2015/10/31-nights-of-terror-2015-5-deathgasm.html.
Three Supermen Against Godfather (1979) DVD
- Back into the Grindhouse Experience 2 boxset, and next up we have an all-together odd little movie otherwise known as Supermenler. Apparently the 9th of 11 Three Supermen movies which ranged from 1967 to 1986, this is a goofy comedy set in Turkey that feels like a low budget episode of the 1960s Batman TV series. Most of the intended comedy falls flat, while there are unintentional laughs (one guy's whiney dubbed voice is hilarious). The theme song that plays constantly throughout the climax is so, so annoying. The setting is apt, because this is one big turkey.
Mister Deathman (1977) DVD
- The last of the Grindhouse 2 movies for a while (there are others I haven't seen, but I'll save them for another time) is this very poor excuse for a blaxploitation movie. Filmed in South Africa, it stars the main guy from Zombie Island Massacre who tries to play a suave Bond-like superspy but his acting is beyond terrible. The bad guys are boring, our hero seemingly gets captured every few minutes, and the plot is groan-worthy. If there was a behind-the-scenes documentary about the making of this movie I'd watch it - it would be interesting to hear how the main black actor found filming in apartheid-era South Africa - and let's face it, it would have to be better than the actual movie itself.
Blood Night: The Legend of Mary Hatchet (2009) DVD
- I really have to stop choosing movies to watch based on the actors involved. That bit me on the ass with Old 37 and it kind of did again here, and Bill Moseley is involved again (along with horror fan darling Danielle Harris). Bill's the definite highlight here, as he's in full Crazy Ralph from Friday the 13th mode (he even dresses the same, so it's obviously a homage). The movie starts off pretty well with a good opening murder and some time in an asylum, but when it switches to the present day and turns the spotlight on various annoying teens, things break down. I couldn't wait for these douchebags to get dead, and unfortunately it took so long to happen, with endless teen partying bogging things down. Sloppy editing and the fact that it looks like it was shot on a handicam (not in terms of shakiness, but of quality - it feels like a home movie, not a film) make this one a pretty unbearable mess.
MOVEMBER MINI-MOVIETHON
- November is of course the month when men grow all shapes and sizes of mustachios in the name of charity (not me, I'm be-goateed all year round, gotta hide those double chins somehow). So, with that in mind, I decided to find movies featuring standout supporting performances by upper-lip caterpillars.
Turkey Shoot (1982) DVD
- First up is Roger Ward's menacing mo-and-eyebrows combo from this Australian exploitation (Oz-ploitation) classic. I've always loved this movie - it's beautifully shot, has plenty of action and its simple storyline is essentially Most Dangerous Game mixed with 1984. But it also has plenty of tasty cheese to stop it from being too mainstream, like the hairy "freak" hunter, the woman's exploding arrows, the weird futuristic vehicles and the pre-requisite smatterings of T&A and attempted rape. Steve Railsback is a weird choice for a leading man - the guy who would go on to play an uber-creepy Ed Gein is hardly charismatic pin-up material. But that's not to take away from this movie, which is a must for any fans of exploitation flicks.
Witchfinder General (1968) DVD
- As a huge Vincent Price fan (I collect his movies on DVD) this is one that had managed to slip through the cracks, until now. Price's facial hair isn't anything too special, but hey, it's there, so it makes this movie count for this moviethon! Okay, so I was just looking for an excuse to include this one. Vincent is great as always, although rather subdued by his standards (after watching a doco on director Michael Reeves it seems he told the legendary actor to tone down his performance). The supporting cast is great (Ian Ogilvy is always good to watch) and this gets quite brutal in places (like the burning of the witch at the stake - my DVD has a lot of the cut violence restored). This is essentially a western set in ye olde England, and it's a good one! Definite recommendation.
The Big Lebowski (1998) AVI
- I'm sure everyone has a movie or two that it seems EVERYONE has seen and enjoyed, but which they've managed to miss somehow. Rather embarrassingly, this is that movie for me. I know it's a cult classic and I do enjoy the Coen brothers, but this one just never found its way in front of my eyes. I had it on my list on Netflix to watch a few months ago, but now when I went to watch it... it's not on Netflix anymore. Don't you hate that? Anyway, a quick acquisition from an "alternative source" and now I can finally say I've seen The Big Lebowski and now know what all the memes and quotes are in reference to. Oh yeah, obviously the mustache in this one belongs to Sam Elliott's The Stranger, although there are a couple of other commendable face-hair efforts in this movie. As for the movie itself, it is as good as everyone makes it out to be. The Dude abides man!
Labels:
action,
DVD,
exploitation,
grindhouse,
horror,
italian,
low budget,
Movember Moviethon
Thursday, November 12, 2015
What I Watched - November 1-7 2015
WHAT I WATCHED - NOVEMBER 1-7 2015:
The Death of Superman Lives: What Happened? (2015) Youtube
- This is one I've been meaning to check out for a while now after reading Kevin Smith's latest autobiography, Tough Shit, a few months back. I honestly didn't know anything about this other than reading a few brief mentions about a failed Superman movie over the years. After watching this doco, I think I'm probably in the same boat as everyone else - I really, really wish Tim Burton had been allowed to make his movie with Nicolas Cage as Supes! Would it have been great? Probably not (I'm not a fan of anything non-animated that Burton has done in the last 15 years), but it would have been unique, that's for damn sure! This documentary is definitely worth checking out, whether you're a fan of superheroes or not.
The Canal (2014) Netflix
- I'm writing this a couple of weeks after I watched this, and not much about it sticks in my mind, which probably says a lot. But I do remember liking it - the acting was good and the suspense was very well done. Not really horror, more psychological thriller, but one that'll keep you guessing and interested for the whole hour and a half.
The Keep (1983) VHS
- It's rare for me to watch VHS these days, having sold off most of my collection (which numbered in the many hundreds) over the past year or so. But this is one I found hidden away in a box in my garage and I had to give it a watch before putting it up for sale - especially since it has never been released on DVD. I love, love, love this movie! Sure, some of the effects are a bit cheesy, but the Tangerine Dream score is phenomenal and director Michael Mann brings a dream-like quality to proceedings. Damn I want to see this on a decent print - is a bluray really too much to ask?
Can't Hardly Wait (1998) Netflix
- A brief excursion into romantic comedy territory. But hey, this one is actually really good - it reminds me of the 1980s John Hughes teen comedies that I grew up on.
V for Vendetta (2005) DVD
- Remember, remember the 5th of November. And what better movie to watch on Guy Fawkes Night? I do enjoy the look of this movie, it has some stellar cinematography, as you'd hope for when a comic book is adapted to the screen. The story has never been one that really resonates with me though, unfortunately. Call me a crotchety old man, but the "V" mask has lost its impact for me due to its use by the hacking group Anonymous in real life. Still, this is a good watch.
LONG PORK DOUBLE FEATURE:
Bone Tomahawk (2015) AVI
- Boy did I love this movie! Obviously I love horror movies, and I do really enjoy westerns - the two are sadly not joined together very often in cinema. But that's now changed, because Bone Tomahawk is fantastic. Sure, it's more western than horror, but there's some genuine creepiness to the cannibal natives in this here yarn. The cinematography of the dusty, old west setting is excellent, the story is well written and the effects are top notch. But what really makes this stand out is the acting. A big thank you to whoever decided to cast Kurt Russell in the sheriff role - after the perfection ghtat is Tombstone I could watch Kurt act in westerns for the rest of my days. And the supporting cast (including The Conjuring's Patrick Wilson and a brief appearance by genre favourite Sid Haig) is great. More horror westerns please!
The Green Inferno (2015) AVI
- Ah yes, Eli Roth. The guy gets a lot of hate, but I'm not on board with that. He at least makes interesting movies, if not always great. I like to think of him as horror's answer to Quentin Tarantino (with no doubt a fraction the talent), and he's in full-on Tarantino-mode in this one. Whereas Tarantino has paid homage to the likes of blaxploitation, martial arts and spaghetti westerns in recent years, Roth chooses to make a love letter to 1970s Italian cannibal flicks. Thankfully the one thing he left out is the awful animal cruelty of those original offerings, so The Green Inferno has that going for it. Unfortunately the gore is also lacking in comparison (but still quite abundant) and there's no nudity, but there is some nice visuals (the natives in full red bodypaint are visually striking) and the acting is pretty good. You won't care about the characters, but that's beside the point in these movies I guess. Roth gets an A for effort and at least, unlike the animal-cruelty-filled 70s flicks, I can see myself watching this one again some time soon.
Labels:
cannibals,
comedy,
documentary,
double feature,
DVD,
horror,
not on DVD,
streaming,
VHS,
western
Friday, October 30, 2015
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #34 - The Borderlands (2013)
The Borderlands (2013)
Director: Elliot Goldner
Starring: Gordon Kennedy, Robin Hill, Aidan McArdle
Format: AVI
Plot: A team of Vatican investigators descends upon a church in a remote area to demystify the unusual happenings, but what they discover is more disturbing than they had first imagined.
Also known as Final Prayer (a more fitting name), this is one of those movies that is saved by its third act and ending.
That's not to say the rest of the movie is bad. As found footage paranormal movies go it's simply watchable for the first two-thirds. Like all films of this kind, nothing much happens at the start, then the tension and suspense ramps up. The early portions are all about getting us comfortable with the characters before the bad stuff goes down, and the actors do a good job of bringing fun-loving techie Gray (Hill), hard-drinking and cynical church investigator Deacon (Kennedy), and by-the-book priest Mark (McArdle) to life.
Once the paranormal stuff starts it's nothing we haven't seen before, but the isolated setting (which I love) adds to an overall creepy atmosphere. Then late in the piece one of the characters goes investigating by himself at night and the suspense really ramps up, leading to an ending that I was left thinking about for days afterwards.
Those who don't like found footage films will probably want to bypass this one, but if that doesn't put you off, give it a watch, for the ending alone if for nothing else.
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
found footage,
horror,
paranormal,
religion
Thursday, October 29, 2015
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #31 - The Changeling (1980)
The Changeling (1980)
Director: Peter Medak
Starring: George C Scott, Trish van Devere, Melvyn Douglas
Format: DVD
Plot: A man staying at a secluded historical mansion finds himself being haunted by the presence of a spectre.
This is one of the classic horror movies that have so far evaded my collection - it's been quite hard to find here in New Zealand in recent years. So when I spotted the DVD at a booth at Armageddon (NZ's big Comic Con-type convention) on Saturday October 25 I snapped it up and watched it that night.
That's right - movie number 31 on the 25th! I'm well ahead of schedule this year! And what a great movie to pass that magic 31 milestone.
I won't go too much into the plot, because most people have probably seen this (if not, you should), and it's also one of those movies best watched without knowing too much about it. But what I will say is this is one of THE great haunted house movies, up there with the original The Haunting in my opinion.
Director Medak does a fantastic job of building up the suspense and atmosphere, and the acting is ably handled by real life couple Scott and van Devere. The cinematography is top notch and the script has enough twist and turns to keep things interesting throughout. I'm a great believer in less-is-more when it comes to ghost movies, and The Changeling fits the bill perfectly.
I really don't know what else to say about this other than if you haven't seen it, you need to!
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
80s,
horror,
supernatural
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #29 - Tales of Halloween (2015)
Tales of Halloween (2015)
Directors: A bunch of people
Starring: A bunch more people
Format: AVI
Plot: Ten stories are woven together by their shared theme of Halloween night in an American suburb, where ghouls, imps, aliens and axe murderers appear for one night only to terrorize unsuspecting residents.
Between this one, All Hallow's Eve and A Christmas Horror Story, this year's countdown has become something of an anthology-fest. This is probably the most-hyped of them, with such high-profile directors as Darren Lynn Bousman (Saw series), Lucky McKee (May) and Neil Marshall (Dog Soldiers) helming a series of short segments all based around Halloween.
The acting credits are also fairly impressive, with appearances by such genre favorites as Adrienne Barbeau (The Fog), Lin Shaye (Insidious movies), Barry Bostwick (Rocky Horror Picture Show), Barbara Crampton (Re-animator) and Caroline Williams (Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2). A handful of horror directors - Mick Garris, Joe Dante, Stuart Gordon, John Landis and Adam Green among them - also make cameos in acting roles.
With 10 segments there's no way I'm about to go through them one at a time. Instead I'll mention the ones that stick out.
My favourite is "The Night Billy Raised Hell", by Bousman and starring Bostwick at his campy best causing all sorts of havoc on Halloween night. It's just so much fun and has a dark twist to it.
I also really enjoyed "Bad Seed" by Neil Marshall, about a killer Jack O' Lantern that eats people. Simple but effective and the pumpkin effects are top notch.
Another great one is "The Ransom of Rusty Rex", directed by Ryan Schifrin and starring the late Ben Woolf (Meep on American Horror Story) and John Landis. It's funny and creepy at the same time.
In truth there are no stinkers amongst the 10 segments. All are good, all are different, but they all have a real Halloween feel to them. Some are funny, some are scary, some are both - but all are quality. Tales of Halloween blows the VHS movies and the ABCs of Death series out of the water, and deserves to be watched every Halloween season alongside Trick R Treat.
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
anthology,
Halloween,
horror
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #27 - The Relic (1997)
The Relic (1997)
Director: Peter Hyams
Starring: Penelope Ann Miller, Tom Sizemore, Linda Hunt
Format: Netflix
Plot: A homicide detective and an anthropologist try to destroy a South American lizard-like god, who's on a people eating rampage in a Chicago museum.
I was looking for something to watch on Netflix and came across this one, which I hadn't seen since the time it came out. I remember back in 1997 there were two big-budget monster movies that came out at the same time - Guillermo del Toro's Mimic and this one. Both even had woman scientists as their main protagonists.
In this one the role of museum scientist is played by Penelope Ann Miller, what ever happened to her? It seemed like she was in a few things for a while there, but I haven't heard much from her in recent years. On the other hand the downfall of Tom Sizemore is well documented - he went from landing biggish roles to low budget obscurity thanks to his vices.
Sizemore is perfectly cast here as the slightly-grumpy old school cop, who pairs up with Miller to track down a monster lurking in a large museum. Wisely the creature is kept off screen for most of the running time, but even when it appears in full it's impressive (designed by the late great Stan Winston). The story around how it ends up in Chicago is fairly well thought out, while the rest of the plot is pure monster movie. The kills don't get very graphic, but there's a decent amount of kills and blood.
The more cynical out there have referred to this as nothing more than Alien in a museum, and that's not far from the truth, but it works. Another comparison I would throw in is Jurassic Park - it has similar cinematography and music and that big budget polish. If you like your horror move gritty and less refined, you'll probably want to pass by this one. Otherwise it's definitely worth a watch, particularly if you like monster movies.
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
horror,
monster,
nature attacks
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #26 - Savaged (2013)
Savaged (2013) aka Avenged
Director: Michael S Ojeda
Starring: Amanda Adrienne Smith, Tom Ardavany, Ronnie Gene Blevins
Format: AVI
Plot: A deaf girl is brutalized by a murderous gang who are then hunted by her when the bloodthirsty spirit of an Apache warrior inhabits her lifeless body.
Rape revenge movies are a regular staple of the horror/exploitation market, with movies like Last House on the Left and I Spit on Your Grave the most well-known of them. With this lower-budget offering, director Ojeda takes that familiar theme, adds a supernatural Native American element and produces a pretty damn good little watch. Think of it as a mix of The Crow and I Spit on Your Grave.
Amanda Adrienne Smith plays the raped girl and does a great job playing both the victim and then subsequently the avenger. Because her character is deaf she doesn't talk much except for in the beginning, but her expressions get the job done. In some ways she has a Marilyn Burns from TCM vibe about her.
The acting is one of the biggest assets of this movie. Along with Smith, the acting is great from the rest of the cast, which is mainly made up of scumbag rapists. Too often in low budget movies the "bad guys" aren't convincing, but these guys sure are. Trust me, by the end of proceedings you'll be cheering as they get their nasty comeuppance.
And nasty it is. Ojeda and company don't skimp on the gore, which I appreciate. They also do a good job with the many fight scenes, which isn't surprising given Ojeda's background in choreographing battle re-enactments in historical documentaries.
Savaged is a nice little spin on the rape revenge sub-genre. If that's not your thing give it a miss, but otherwise I recommend it.
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
fight back,
horror,
rednecks,
supernatural
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #25 - All Hallow's Eve (2013)
All Hallow's Eve (2013)
Director: Damian Leone
Starring: Katie Maguire, Catherine A Callahan, Marie Maser
Format: AVI
Plot: While watching two children on Halloween night, a babysitter finds an old VHS tape in the kids' trick or treat bag. The tape features three tales of terror, all linked together by a murderous clown. As the night goes on strange things begin to occur in the house. It isn't long before the babysitter learns the horrifying truth... the maniacal clown is slowly working his way into her reality.
I do love a good anthology movie, and having watched A Christmas Story earlier in the marathon, I felt it was time to check out a Halloween-themed one. What I do not love is clowns. I hate them. They terrify me. Take a look at that cover art above - yikes!
A bit of background on this one - two of the three segments in All Hallow's Eve are actually short films made by director Leone years before. So he shot a new segment and some wrap-around stuff and Bob's your uncle. Well Bobo I guess, and he's your murdering uncle.
One of the pre-made shorts deals with a woman who is visited by aliens. It's not terrible, but definitely the weakest of the segments, held down by some dodgy effects and the fact that, well, not much really happens in it.
The other segments are all pretty good, especially considering the low budget. The wrap-around segment is simple enough and akin to the VHS movies in involving a mystery video tape containing the three "stories", and has a fairly brutal and gorey pay-off. The first segment, which introduces the clown, isn't anything too great but gets good use out of a creepy setting (deserted railway station and railway tunnels) and an even creepier clown. The best of the three is the segment titled Terrifier, involving the same clown and a gas station.
Leone achieves a lot with very little with this nice little anthology. It's not flawless by any means but what is lacks in budget it makes up for with creepy style, some good gore and simple storytelling.
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
anthology,
Halloween,
horror,
low budget
Friday, October 16, 2015
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #13 - The Hoarder (2015)
The Hoarder (2015)
Director: Matt WinnStarring: Mischa Barton, Robert Knepper, Charlotte Salt
Format: AVI
Plot: When Ella discovers her Wall Street banker boyfriend is renting a secret storage unit, she suspects he's using it to hide an affair. Enlisting the help of her best friend Molly she breaks into the facility only to discover something more terrifying instead. Now trapped in a darkened building with a group of neurotic strangers who start disappearing one by one, Ella soon uncovers even worse horror in the dank depths. Her life or death battle to escape eternal enslavement is about to begin....
The name of this one appealed to me because, well, I'm a bit of a hoarder. No, I'm not one of those "living in piles of filth" people you might see on TV's Hoarders. But I do collect a lot of stuff and like to refer to myself as an "organised hoarder". Sadly this movie has absolutely nothing to do with hoarding - the closest its gets is being set in a multi-level self-storage building.
The building itself is a pretty good setting for a horror movie - dark, claustrophobic, cluttered. The script also makes good use of lights on timers that keep turning off. And of course with all the wacky and wonderful things people keep in their storage lockers, that allows for all sorts of weapons for the protagonists to use to fight back.
Fight back against what exactly? Well, I don't want to give anything away, but I will say that The Hoarder does a good job of keeping the viewer guessing whether this is a straight-up slasher or something paranormal. The gore factor isn't bad but nothing that will amaze gorehounds. The acting is pretty mediocre (especially Barton, whose lack of emotion and wavering American accent is distracting) except for Knepper, who is good in anything.
One thing that did surprise me about this movie is that it doesn't really build up the suspense as you would expect. The two women arrive at the storage building and BAM! The action begins. From there things happen at a steady clip, making sure things are never boring. Some of the actions of the characters are just plain dumb, but the twist towards the end is fun and the ending satisfying.
Thursday, October 15, 2015
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #11 - The Final Girls (2015)
Director: Todd Strauss-Schulson
Starring: Taissa Farmiga, Malin Akerman, Adam DeVine
Format: AVI
Plot: When Max (Taissa Farmiga) and her friends reluctantly attend a tribute screening of an infamous '80s slasher film that starred Max's late mother (Malin Akerman), they are accidentally sucked into the silver screen. They soon realize they are trapped inside the cult classic movie and must team up with the fictional and ill-fated "Camp Bloodbath" counselors, including Max's mom as the shy scream queen, to battle the film's machete-wielding, masked killer. With the body count rising in scene after iconic scene, who will be THE FINAL GIRLS left standing and live to escape this film?
The Final Girls is the ultimate comedic love-letter to 80s slasher films. As someone who grew up on that genre, I really, really enjoyed this movie.
Everything 80s is riffed here, but in a way that has both laughs and heart, rather than a ridiculous Scary Movie parody manner. It's also obvious that the director is a fan of the source material - when our group of protagonists end up "inside" their favourite 80s slasher, it really does feel like they've been transported back to a Friday the 13th flick.
The acting here is great. I really enjoyed Taissa Farmiga's previous work on two seasons of TV show American Horror Story, and she's perfectly cast here as the quiet, sensitive teenage girl mourning the loss of her film star mum. Malin Akerman looks familiar but looking at her credits I don't think I've seen her in much. But she has great chemistry with Farmiga, which helps provide the emotional pull. Comedic value is added by Adam DeVine (TV's Workaholics) - whose performance does grate the nerves a bit at times but is perfect for the douchebag jock that was in every 80s summer camp horror flick - and Thomas Middleditch, who is excellent as the resident horror movie geek.
The only complaint I have is that this movie is virtually devoid of gore. There's a little bit of blood splattered around, but it's lacking compared to actual 80s slashers. If you're going to pay homage to those movies, you need some good blood and guts. There's also no nudity - a pre-requisite of 80s slashers - but that's neither here nor there.
I have a feeling that the younger crowd will probably enjoy this movie well enough, but to really appreciate it you need to have lived through the 80s and to have watched your fair share of Friday the 13th-type slashers from that decade.
Don't expect scares or any real suspense - go into this one for the laughs and the loving tribute it pays to slasher flicks.
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
80s,
comedy,
homage,
horror,
summer camp,
time travel
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #7 - The Gallows (2015)
The Gallows (2015)
Director: Travis Cluff, Chris LofingStarring: Reese Mishler, Pfeifer Brown, Ryan Shoos
Format: AVI
Plot: 20 years after a horrific accident during a small town school play, students at the school resurrect the failed show in a misguided attempt to honor the anniversary of the tragedy - but soon discover that some things are better left alone.
There was a lot of buzz about The Gallows when it was released earlier this year. I have to say I wasn't blown away by the trailer, so unlike a lot of people I probably went into my first viewing with low expectations. My expectations were met, and no, that's not a compliment.
I've said before I don't mind found footage flicks, and this one is actually really well shot, but it falls short in just about every other aspect. The acting is pretty bad, the scares are virtually non-existant and the script is ho-hum. It's a shame, because the concept of a killer who dies in a school play and comes back to haunt future productions could have been good. The end twist is not bad, but also not good enough to save the dreck that has gone before it.
The biggest complaint I have about The Gallows is that the group of main characters is completely unlikeable, especially douchebag Ryan (who I wanted to get killed off inside of five minutes). It's impossible to care about the plight of the group of teenagers when you can't relate to them at all. Maybe, as a self-confessed grumpy middle-aged geezer, I'm just not in the teeny-bopper target demographic.
I'd say that fans of modern teeny horror should check out The Gallows, everyone else should bypass it in favor of better fare.
Friday, October 9, 2015
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #6 - Last Shift (2014)
Last Shift (2014)
Director: Anthony DiBlasi (Dread)
Starring: Juliana Harkavy, Joshua Mikel, J. LaRose
Format: AVI
Plot: A rookie cop's 1st shift in the last night of a closing police station alone turns into a living nightmare.
This low-budget affair starts off with a premise that echoes John Carpenter's Assault on Precinct 13 - an old police station is empty because the department has moved into nicer digs down the street. A rookie cop is sent to play night watchmen on her first shift (and the last shift for the station, hence the name). But unlike it JC's movie the station doesn't come under attack by criminals, or at least not in the conventional sense. Spooky shit starts happening and from there it becomes a "haunted location" flick with some satanist cult elements thrown into the mix.
This low-budget affair starts off with a premise that echoes John Carpenter's Assault on Precinct 13 - an old police station is empty because the department has moved into nicer digs down the street. A rookie cop is sent to play night watchmen on her first shift (and the last shift for the station, hence the name). But unlike it JC's movie the station doesn't come under attack by criminals, or at least not in the conventional sense. Spooky shit starts happening and from there it becomes a "haunted location" flick with some satanist cult elements thrown into the mix.
For the budget what you get is a very slick and well-shot film. The acting's also pretty good (for a bunch of no names) and there are enough jump scares and suspenseful moments to keep things interesting. The cult element is handled well, with the aforementioned cultists having a very Manson-esque vibe to them.
Unfortunately a lot of the early going happens in a brightly-lit police station, which detracts from the suspense, but unlike a lot of others I don't have a problem with the slow-burn approach taken here. Once the action kicks in it's entertaining and includes some really nice visual effects. The end twist is also pretty good, I didn't see it coming.
Last Shift isn't anything mind-blowing, but is definitely worth a watch for horror fans who don't mind a slow pace.
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
horror,
low budget,
paranormal
Thursday, October 8, 2015
31 Nights of Terror 2015 #5 - Deathgasm (2015)
Director: Jason Lei Howden
Starring: Milo Cawthorne, James Blake, Kimberley Crossman
Format: AVI
Plot: Two teenage boys unwittingly summon an ancient evil entity known as The Blind One by delving into black magic while trying to escape their mundane lives.
Before sitting down to watch this one, the only thing I knew about it was that it was about heavy metal music. I was aware that it played at a film festival near me a couple of months ago and had even seen one or two publicity shots, but other than that I was going in blind.
The first thing that surprised me was that it's a New Zealand movie. Hell, if I'd known that I wouldn't have downloaded it (I don't DL movies from my own country, preferring to support the industry by buying physical copies of them). But boy am I glad that I did, and I'll be buying it as soon as I can find it on DVD!
That last sentence obviously gives away the fact that I love this movie. In fact, I'd go so far as to say it's my joint favourite horror/comedy movie along with Shaun of the Dead. On top of that it's one of the best movies to come out of my homeland in a long time, and IMO much better than the recent What We Did in the Shadows, which seems to be a darling of the critics (I liked it, but Deathgasm to me is much better).
Maybe one of the reasons I dig Deathgasm so much is because I'm a metaller. Have been since I was 12 years old, and I'm now 40. Ask anyone who knew me as a teenager, and they'll tell you that I basically was the main character from this movie - a long-haired loner who lived for heavy metal. Well, without the ability to actually play guitar, but I do play a mean air axe.
But even with my love for all things metal, and of course all things horror, this movie could have still missed the mark as so many horror/comedy hybrids do. Instead it ticked all the boxes. The main characters are likeable and relatable, the comedy is hilarious (I don't want to give anything away, but I found myself in loud fits of laughter during the scene involving "marital aids"), the music kicks serious butt and best of all the gore (outrageously over the top ala Peter Jackson's Brain Dead or Bad Taste) is done with practical effects, not CGI.
The only slight disappointment is in the climax, which doesn't live up to what it was building up to, but it's a small complaint. I can't recommend this movie enough and am damn proud that it came out of my country!
Labels:
31 Nights of Terror,
demon,
heavy metal music,
horror,
New Zealand
Tuesday, June 2, 2015
What I Watched - May 20-26 2015
Deadly Prey (1987) VHS
- Pure “so bad its good” gold from director David Prior and his blond-mulleted actor brother Ted. Take Rambo, take The Most Dangerous Game… remove the budget, the good acting and the special effects and you have Deadly Prey. Every moment of this movie is unadulterated awesomeness. Ted plays a Nam vet who is kidnapped by some bad guys who love to hunt humans. Only they chose the wrong guy this time! Another from my own collection (all of which I’m selling off for space purposes), and one every Z-grade action movie fan needs to see (along with other Prior brothers efforts like Aerobicide, Sledgehammer and Raw Nerve).
Slash Dance (1989) AVI
- That’s a catchy title right? Some nice wordplay on the name of the popular 80s movie, Flashdance. Well, that’s all this pile of crap has going for it. The premise is simple - girls auditioning for a musical start getting picked off by a serial killer so a sexy female cop goes undercover to catch him. There’s nothing wrong with a slasher that keeps it simple. But there’s plenty wrong with a slasher that features virtually no blood, no skin (come on, it’s a movie about dancing girls!) and some of the worst acting ever put to screen (the lead and several other of the “actors” were wrestlers from the short-lived Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling, and acting wasn’t their strong point). Instead it has tedious amounts of girls in leotards “dancing” on stage - I use that word very, very reluctantly. Yawn, yawn, yawn.
Mortuary (2005) AVI
- Oh Tobe Hooper, we knew ye well. It’s well known that Hooper has gone from genre hero (Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Poltergeist) to genre zero (virtually everything after Texas Chainsaw 2 in 1986). Sadly, Mortuary doesn’t represent a return to form for him. The premise is okay - family move into an old house to restart an old mortuary and come under attack by a fungal growth that turns dead people into zombies - but it’s all done rather poorly (especially the CGI, yikes). Not the worst movie ever made, but definitely nothing worth wasting your time on.
JUDGEMENT MAY: I Survived a Zombie Holocaust (2014) DVD
- Pretty much the only time I buy movies on their released date is when it’s a New Zealand movie I really want to see, like this one. It was released on DVD and in a few cinemas here in NZ on Friday May 22. I picked it up a day later and watched it right away, and I wasn’t disappointed. It definitely feels very New Zealand-y, mixing our sense of humour with gore in the same vein as Braindead, Bad Taste and Black Sheep. I love the fact it’s about real zombies attacking the cast and crew of a low budget zombie movie, which gives it ammo to take shots at the movie industry as well as the overdone zombie sub-genre. NZ horror is on a real roll lately, between this, Housebound and What We Do in the Shadows.
Joe (1970) DVD
- With Memorial Day happening in the US, I wanted to watch something very ‘Murican. The cover to this one showed an Army uniform, a guy with a gun and the Stars and Stripes - sold! I knew nothing about it going in and found it to be a gritty, gloomy look at life in the late 60s and early 70s, a time of racial and civil unrest in Vietnam-era America. The late, great Peter Boyle shows off the grumpy chops he’d use so well in the TV show Everybody Loves Raymond, as a disgruntled, racist blue collar worker who befriends a rich guy with a wayward daughter, as the two go on a rampage against hippies. Blunt, un-PC, brutal in places and with a great ending. Kind of like Easy Rider without the motorbikes.
Labels:
action,
DVD,
horror,
Judgement May,
low budget,
New Zealand,
Ted Prior,
Tobe Hooper,
VHS,
zombies
Friday, May 22, 2015
What I Watched - May 13-19 2015
WHAT I WATCHED - MAY 13-19 2015:
Chopping Mall (1986) VHS
- Another title I wanted to give one more watch before selling (I’m selling off my VHS collection to make space). This has always been a favourite of mine. I mean, come on, it’s about killer security robots hunting and killing young people in a mall at night. How could you not love that? I’ve previously reviewed this as part of the Corman-ia 2011 marathon - see that review here (www.moviegeeknz.blogspot.co.nz/2011/06/cormania-2011-chopping-mall.html)
JUDGEMENT MAY: Night of the Living Dead (1968) DVD
- I’ve decided that for the remainder of May the month’s theme will be post-apocalyptic/end-of-the-world movies. And what better way to kick it off with the zombie apocalypse movie that started it all. My girlfriend had never seen this before, making it an even better choice to get this theme underway. Obviously I don’t need to say anything about this one that hasn’t already been said. Absolute classic.
Firepower (1993) VHS
- I had this one sitting among the many piles of VHS I’m setting about selling from own collection, and hadn’t really given it any thought. That is until I saw a trailer for it on another VHS, and found out that the one and only Ultimate Warrior acts in this! My favourite WWF guy from the late 80s playing a bad guy called The Swordsman? Yes please! In the future year of 2007 (hehe), some cities are designated as lawless zones where the police don’t dare to go. But two rulebreaking cops (Steve McQueen’s kid Chad and former world kickboxing champ Gary Daniels) go in under-cover to catch a major bad guy, and fight their way through an underground fighting league (where the aforementioned Swordsman is the champ). Lots of in-ring action (punch/kick fighting and weapons), the best of which is when Daniels is featured. Predictable but good mindless fun!
Hold Your Breath (2012) DVD
- Last May the theme here on Schlock to the System was “May-de to be Mocked” (mockbusters), during which I ended watching way more The Asylum flicks than is entirely healthy. Fast forward a year and I pop on this slasher, not knowing a thing about it, and during the opening credits… yep, it’s produced by those purveyors of budget-conscious tripe, The Asylum. Apparently this was the first movie they ever released to cinemas - I feel sorry for whoever paid cinema ticket prices to sit through this one. Low-budget slasher based around an executed criminal whose spirit jumps from body to body. Think The Fallen without the budget, or the plot. Or anything really. Definitely worth skipping.
Repentance (2013) Netflix
- I watched this under duress after my girlfriend chose it for our night’s viewing, and found it to be not too bad. It has a good cast, including the always-dependable Forest Whitaker and Anthony Mackie, and a plot that starts off predictable but takes a few twists and turns. A little too corny and preachy for my liking, but the good acting and some intense torture scenes kept me in it until the end. Not bad if you’ve got some time to waste and are looking for something to watch.
JUDGEMENT MAY: Vanishing on 7th Street (2010) DVD
- What drew me to this movie the most (apart from the fact I picked it up secondhand for extremely cheap) was director Brad Anderson. I love two of his early movies, Session 9 and The Mechanic. While this doesn’t live up to those, it’s still a solid watch, especially if you’re fascinated by post-apocalyptic movies like me. In this case it’s an end-of-world scenario where most of the world’s population disappears in an instant, leaving just a few confused survivors (including ol’ Annakin Skywalker himself Hayden Christensen and John Leguizamo in a rare non-comedic role). When the enemy is revealed to be shadow creatures, the survivors must stay in the light at all costs. Anderson once again shows that he knows how to build suspense (the gimmick here allows him to re-use a few “lights going out” tricks from Session 9) and while there’s nothing overly memorable about Vanishing on 7th Street, I can give it a mild recommendation.
Chopping Mall (1986) VHS
- Another title I wanted to give one more watch before selling (I’m selling off my VHS collection to make space). This has always been a favourite of mine. I mean, come on, it’s about killer security robots hunting and killing young people in a mall at night. How could you not love that? I’ve previously reviewed this as part of the Corman-ia 2011 marathon - see that review here (www.moviegeeknz.blogspot.co.nz/2011/06/cormania-2011-chopping-mall.html)
JUDGEMENT MAY: Night of the Living Dead (1968) DVD
- I’ve decided that for the remainder of May the month’s theme will be post-apocalyptic/end-of-the-world movies. And what better way to kick it off with the zombie apocalypse movie that started it all. My girlfriend had never seen this before, making it an even better choice to get this theme underway. Obviously I don’t need to say anything about this one that hasn’t already been said. Absolute classic.
- I had this one sitting among the many piles of VHS I’m setting about selling from own collection, and hadn’t really given it any thought. That is until I saw a trailer for it on another VHS, and found out that the one and only Ultimate Warrior acts in this! My favourite WWF guy from the late 80s playing a bad guy called The Swordsman? Yes please! In the future year of 2007 (hehe), some cities are designated as lawless zones where the police don’t dare to go. But two rulebreaking cops (Steve McQueen’s kid Chad and former world kickboxing champ Gary Daniels) go in under-cover to catch a major bad guy, and fight their way through an underground fighting league (where the aforementioned Swordsman is the champ). Lots of in-ring action (punch/kick fighting and weapons), the best of which is when Daniels is featured. Predictable but good mindless fun!
Hold Your Breath (2012) DVD
- Last May the theme here on Schlock to the System was “May-de to be Mocked” (mockbusters), during which I ended watching way more The Asylum flicks than is entirely healthy. Fast forward a year and I pop on this slasher, not knowing a thing about it, and during the opening credits… yep, it’s produced by those purveyors of budget-conscious tripe, The Asylum. Apparently this was the first movie they ever released to cinemas - I feel sorry for whoever paid cinema ticket prices to sit through this one. Low-budget slasher based around an executed criminal whose spirit jumps from body to body. Think The Fallen without the budget, or the plot. Or anything really. Definitely worth skipping.
Repentance (2013) Netflix
- I watched this under duress after my girlfriend chose it for our night’s viewing, and found it to be not too bad. It has a good cast, including the always-dependable Forest Whitaker and Anthony Mackie, and a plot that starts off predictable but takes a few twists and turns. A little too corny and preachy for my liking, but the good acting and some intense torture scenes kept me in it until the end. Not bad if you’ve got some time to waste and are looking for something to watch.
JUDGEMENT MAY: Vanishing on 7th Street (2010) DVD
- What drew me to this movie the most (apart from the fact I picked it up secondhand for extremely cheap) was director Brad Anderson. I love two of his early movies, Session 9 and The Mechanic. While this doesn’t live up to those, it’s still a solid watch, especially if you’re fascinated by post-apocalyptic movies like me. In this case it’s an end-of-world scenario where most of the world’s population disappears in an instant, leaving just a few confused survivors (including ol’ Annakin Skywalker himself Hayden Christensen and John Leguizamo in a rare non-comedic role). When the enemy is revealed to be shadow creatures, the survivors must stay in the light at all costs. Anderson once again shows that he knows how to build suspense (the gimmick here allows him to re-use a few “lights going out” tricks from Session 9) and while there’s nothing overly memorable about Vanishing on 7th Street, I can give it a mild recommendation.
Labels:
drama,
DVD,
horror,
Judgement May,
post-apocalypse,
robots,
VHS,
zombies
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
What I Watched - May 6-12 2015
WHAT I WATCHED: May 6-12
A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night (2014) Netflix
- There’s been a lot of hype about this movie online recently, and not all of it positive. I’ve heard some horror fans complain that “it’s not a horror movie”, and in some ways they’re right. It’s more of an arthouse movie (shot in black and white) with some horror elements. I dug the unique setting (California doubling as Iran) and most importantly found the leads to be compelling. The comparisons with Let the Right One In are unavoidable, and while it’s not quite as good as that one, it definitely deserves plenty of praise.
Blood Lake (1987) Youtube
- I’m a sucker for obscure genre flicks that haven’t been released on DVD. Bored one night at work, I found this on Youtube and settled in for a viewing. Yikes is this one bad. Plotwise it is your atypical slasher - group of teens spend a weekend at a lakehouse and get picked off by a maniac. But what makes it so excrutiating to watch is the acting. The cast of unknowns, many of whom didn’t act again after this, look absolutely lost on camera. They stumble through their lines and spend most of the time looking around as if wondering what to do next. The action doesn’t begin until 45-minutes into the film, before that we’re treated to such pleasures as watching the teens waterski and play drinking games, all in the most unexciting manner imaginable. Blood Lake is only for the most masochistic of B-movie fans.
Braindead (1992) VHS
- I’m in the process of selling off my rather-large VHS collection, as I just don’t have room for them anymore. My girlfriend had never seen this New Zealand classic, directed by the one and only Peter Jackson, so I threw it in the old machine for a watch before I sell it. This copy is the American one, titled Dead Alive, but it’ll always be Braindead to me. Simply put, this is one of the greatest horror comedies ever made. From the kung fu kicking Priest (“I kick ass in the name of the Lord”) to the gory-beyond-words lawnmower finale, you can’t go wrong with Braindead.
Slaughter High (1986) VHS
- Another one I decided to pop in for a watch before selling. Not the greatest 80s slasher, but any fan of slashers is going to have a good time watching it. The premise is very similar to 1981’s The Burning, but instead of a caretaker falling foul of a teenaged prank, it’s the school nerd. Like Cropsy, said nerd exacts his revenge on the perpetrators, some 10 years later at a school reunion.
Blood Rage (1987) AVI
- AKA Nightmare at Shadow Woods. Apparently this was made in 1983 but not released until 1987, which is never a good sign. Another obscure not-on-DVD feature (although apparently it will be getting the Blu Ray treatment from Arrow later this year). However, unlike Blood Lake, this one has better acting and some good gore. The plot is also moderately interesting, featuring two identical twins, one of whom is a psychopath. Not a bad little twist at the end too.
Honeymoon Horror (1982) AVI
- Yet more not-on-DVD obscurity. Three sets of college couples, newly married, head to an island getaway for their honeymoon, where they are killed by a mystery psycho. I say mystery, but even a coma patient will guess who it is well before the reveal. Bad acting, awful sets, this one has the lot. There are a couple of decent gore kills, but not enough to make this one recommendable. Not even for cheese factor, because apart from a hilariously-wacky small-town sheriff there’s just no fun to be had here.
The Night Brings Charlie (1990) AVI
- Finishing off the trio of obscurities I watched in one night was this Orlando-shot slasher with yet another cast of nobodies. By 1990 slashers were becoming old hat, and this one recycles all the old cliche stuff (including a scene taken straight from a Friday the 13th sequel, in which three bikers are taken out in a barn). But what it lacks in originality this one makes up for with an interesting killer at least (the titular Charlie, wearing overalls, a sack on his head and goggles), a decent twist and some above-average acting.
The Wild Life (1984) VHS
- I always wondered why I’d never heard of this movie before. After all, it was written by Cameron Crowe (FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH, ALMOST FAMOUS etc) and has a pretty good cast of young 80s talent (Chris Penn, Eric Stoltz, Lea Thompson, Jenny Wright). But after watching it I can kind of see how it slipped through the cracks and didn’t become as well-known as other 80s teen comedies. There’s nothing wrong with the acting - Penn is great as the carefree party animal and Stolz is solid as his more conservative buddy - but the script just seems to lack the spark of Fast Times, while covering the same type of ground (teen life set around malls, school etc). Solid but hardly a classic.
A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night (2014) Netflix
- There’s been a lot of hype about this movie online recently, and not all of it positive. I’ve heard some horror fans complain that “it’s not a horror movie”, and in some ways they’re right. It’s more of an arthouse movie (shot in black and white) with some horror elements. I dug the unique setting (California doubling as Iran) and most importantly found the leads to be compelling. The comparisons with Let the Right One In are unavoidable, and while it’s not quite as good as that one, it definitely deserves plenty of praise.
Blood Lake (1987) Youtube
- I’m a sucker for obscure genre flicks that haven’t been released on DVD. Bored one night at work, I found this on Youtube and settled in for a viewing. Yikes is this one bad. Plotwise it is your atypical slasher - group of teens spend a weekend at a lakehouse and get picked off by a maniac. But what makes it so excrutiating to watch is the acting. The cast of unknowns, many of whom didn’t act again after this, look absolutely lost on camera. They stumble through their lines and spend most of the time looking around as if wondering what to do next. The action doesn’t begin until 45-minutes into the film, before that we’re treated to such pleasures as watching the teens waterski and play drinking games, all in the most unexciting manner imaginable. Blood Lake is only for the most masochistic of B-movie fans.
Braindead (1992) VHS
- I’m in the process of selling off my rather-large VHS collection, as I just don’t have room for them anymore. My girlfriend had never seen this New Zealand classic, directed by the one and only Peter Jackson, so I threw it in the old machine for a watch before I sell it. This copy is the American one, titled Dead Alive, but it’ll always be Braindead to me. Simply put, this is one of the greatest horror comedies ever made. From the kung fu kicking Priest (“I kick ass in the name of the Lord”) to the gory-beyond-words lawnmower finale, you can’t go wrong with Braindead.
Slaughter High (1986) VHS
- Another one I decided to pop in for a watch before selling. Not the greatest 80s slasher, but any fan of slashers is going to have a good time watching it. The premise is very similar to 1981’s The Burning, but instead of a caretaker falling foul of a teenaged prank, it’s the school nerd. Like Cropsy, said nerd exacts his revenge on the perpetrators, some 10 years later at a school reunion.
Blood Rage (1987) AVI
- AKA Nightmare at Shadow Woods. Apparently this was made in 1983 but not released until 1987, which is never a good sign. Another obscure not-on-DVD feature (although apparently it will be getting the Blu Ray treatment from Arrow later this year). However, unlike Blood Lake, this one has better acting and some good gore. The plot is also moderately interesting, featuring two identical twins, one of whom is a psychopath. Not a bad little twist at the end too.
Honeymoon Horror (1982) AVI
- Yet more not-on-DVD obscurity. Three sets of college couples, newly married, head to an island getaway for their honeymoon, where they are killed by a mystery psycho. I say mystery, but even a coma patient will guess who it is well before the reveal. Bad acting, awful sets, this one has the lot. There are a couple of decent gore kills, but not enough to make this one recommendable. Not even for cheese factor, because apart from a hilariously-wacky small-town sheriff there’s just no fun to be had here.
The Night Brings Charlie (1990) AVI
- Finishing off the trio of obscurities I watched in one night was this Orlando-shot slasher with yet another cast of nobodies. By 1990 slashers were becoming old hat, and this one recycles all the old cliche stuff (including a scene taken straight from a Friday the 13th sequel, in which three bikers are taken out in a barn). But what it lacks in originality this one makes up for with an interesting killer at least (the titular Charlie, wearing overalls, a sack on his head and goggles), a decent twist and some above-average acting.
The Wild Life (1984) VHS
- I always wondered why I’d never heard of this movie before. After all, it was written by Cameron Crowe (FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH, ALMOST FAMOUS etc) and has a pretty good cast of young 80s talent (Chris Penn, Eric Stoltz, Lea Thompson, Jenny Wright). But after watching it I can kind of see how it slipped through the cracks and didn’t become as well-known as other 80s teen comedies. There’s nothing wrong with the acting - Penn is great as the carefree party animal and Stolz is solid as his more conservative buddy - but the script just seems to lack the spark of Fast Times, while covering the same type of ground (teen life set around malls, school etc). Solid but hardly a classic.
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