Monday, October 24, 2011

31 Nights of Terror #17 - Bats: Human Harvest (2007)

Bats: Human Harvest (2007)
Director: Jamie Dixon
Starring: David Chokachi, Michael Jace, Pollyanna McIntosh, Marty Papazian
Format: DVD (Sony Pictures)

- There in the opening credits is the magic word: Scifi (as in the TV channel they stupidly renamed Syfy). I've said in past reviews that Scifi made-for-TV movies are a definite guilty pleasure of mine.
- To recap, when I watch Scifi movies my expectations lower and I know I'm going to get a few key elements: Bad CGI, a washed-up big name actor or two, and loads of cheese.
- I sure hope this movie can live up to the standards set by the awesome killer bat movies of the past, like, uh... hmmm. Now that I come to think of it I don't remember ever seeing a good killer bat movie.
- I'm surprised there hasn't been more horror set in modern day Afghanistan (ie warzone), or maybe I've just missed them? I only remember Sand Serpents from 2009, which was pretty decent.
- The aforementioned washed-up actor here is David Chokachi, who apparently played a lifeguard on Baywatch.
- And the bad CGI? Well, apart from the killer bats, all of the helicopter shots are quite obviously computer-generated.
- Hey, it's Pollyanna McIntosh, who played the feral woman in Lucky McKee's messed up little flick The Woman (the review of which you can find on this blog).
- Okay, so this didn't stay in Afghanistan for long. Looks like Chechnya is going to be the setting for the rest of the movie.
- The bats disarmed that Chechnyan rebel. He's 'armless now.
- I just remembered a good killer bats movie, Bats, the one with Lou Diamond Phillips. No wait, that was awful.
- Oh, how about Fangs, the one with Corbin Bernsen from 2002? Nope, even worse.
- Hang on, according to IMDB this is a sequel to the Lou Diamond Phillips flick? Okay then.
- Over-used corny line #1: "You hear that?", "What?", "Nothing. No birds, no animals. It's too quiet."
- Over-used corny line #2: "I'm not going anywhere. I'm bleeding to death. You go, I'll get these bastards."
- These bats are apparently able to camoflage themselves against trees, or something like that. I dunno, I'm kind of zoning out.
- To summarise the last third of the movie: Explosions, bats swooping about, explosions, more bats, evil scientist guy is captured, explosions, more bats, big explosion, the end.

Overall thoughts: I mentioned in my notes that my expectations lower for Scifi TV movies, which is maybe why I usually end up enjoying them. Bats: Human Harvest is pretty much on par with most of its ilk, except for one thing that made it boring for me. Bats. They're just not a very interesting "killer creature" as far as I'm concerned. You always know the bats are fake and people running around swatting at the sky doesn't build suspense or terror. I doubt anyone could make a killer bats story that would keep my interest.

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